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Monthly Musings

on Life, Love and What's Happening Now

It's here! Cover Reveal: Married AF.

10/21/2020

1 Comment

 
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​​Get ready to "ALTAR" the party with Married AF: A Funny Marriage Guide for the Newlywed or Bride--the perfect read aloud gift for any wedding celebration.
 
This
 beautifully illustrated hardback is the ultimate present for brides who live in the real world, where marriage is silly, exasperating, and infuriatingly funny. Full of familiar scenarios and pop culture references, even grandma will appreciate its real take on topics from peeing in the wedding dress to aging gracefully with your better half. The book also offers a useful twist by providing a gift register and space for friends and family to write their own special messages, making it the perfect keepsake.

This is THE book to give if you're wondering what to get for a bridal shower gift, bachelorette party, engagement or wedding gift.  


Coming to a book shelf near you Jan 1, 2022.


Pre-Order Now >
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Nothing But Time.

4/3/2020

2 Comments

 
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Mine the Gifts of Covid—or Don’t. However You’re Coping Is Just Fine.

Time.

Suddenly, we all have more than we ever imagined.

There’s no need to rehash what’s happening in the world right now. It’s all around us. It’s on our television screens and newsfeeds, in the unsure faces of our family and friends—most whom we see now only when it's your turn on the computer.   

Have you noticed how obsessed everyone’s become with numbers since COVID started? We can’t seem to get enough—the number of cases, the number of days, the number of deaths. How long will it last? How much will it cost? All day long, they stream on the side of our televisions, a ticker tape of doom.
 
In those first days, I felt gutted. I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t write. When the breakneck pace of my family’s routine came to a screeching halt, I—like most of us—was rudderless. Every day, my emotions pivoted between anger, fear and guilt. Moms are supposed to be a tower of strength. My intestinal fortitude hadn’t gotten the memo.

Then one night during my usual bout with insomnia, sprinkled somewhere between prayers and futile attempts at meditation, it was silly Instagram post that actually took root:   

You are not stuck at home. You are SAFE at home.

One little tweak and the world is different.  

I can’t control this. The government can’t control this. Not how long it will last or what it will do. The only control I have right now is my reaction. Even our national preoccupation with numbers is just another veiled attempt to control what’s uncontrollable. For me, there is relief in the realization. Each day as I watch my husband go off to work at the hospital, it takes a lot of energy to hold up the universe.

Long before this pandemic, I’ve always believed that the true currency of life isn’t money—it’s time. And if that’s true, then we’ve all been given a great gift.

By some miracle, my three boys are getting along better than they ever have. They laugh. They wrestle. We eat dinner together as family every night. Most days, my husband and I take long walks, checking-in with each other in ways that used to happen only monthly.

They are tiny moments, but they’re mine.

It took me some time to feel this way. Some days, my emotions are still a rollercoaster. Wherever you are, give yourself permission to cope without judgement. At the risk of stealing the writer Glenn Doyle Melton’s famous sentiment, “Carpe diem or don’t.”  Just don’t beat yourself up.

There is a bit of teen slang that keeps coming back to me. As the days mount and the news worsens, it seems even more relevant. Whenever I ask my oldest son how he’s doing—good or bad—he always has the same answer, “I’m fine, mom—I’m just ‘vibing.’”

Right now—more than ever—‘vibes’ are all we have. 

One of the best bits of coping advice I’ve heard lately is to journal. Experts say it’s important to record your feelings and experiences as both catharsis and keepsake, and that your children should do the same. And why not? As we yearn so desperately to return to our old lives, shouldn’t we stop to reflect on which parts are worth rushing back to? What do we really have right now? What matters?  However long this takes, there are things the C-word can never take from us:  Our families. Our stories. Our faith.

This too shall pass. If we stay home, if we pray. If we ‘vibe.’  Whatever you’re doing is exactly enough…and that’s the most important gift I can think of.





How are you coping? Comment with you're favorite suggestions and advice!

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8 Books to Read in the New Year for Any Type of Reader.

1/10/2020

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A new decade is here. Whether new year's resolutions make you feel like you could leap tall buildings or want to leap off of them, (both for me) it’s hard to argue with the idea we should all read a little more.

So, no matter if you’re a serious reader, just want a good laugh or fall somewhere in between, I’ve come up with some inspiration to help you turn off the Netflix and find something good to read…
  
  1. ​If you’re a book club type of reader: Where the Crawdads Sing

    Remarkably this is author Delia Owens' first foray into fiction and when I read the bookjacket, I wasn’t sure it was for me. However all the way through this lush story about an isolated girl who finds education and solace in nature, I found myself sobbing and staying-up way too late. Against the backdrop of the North Carolina swamplands, Owens manages to brilliantly mix a coming of age story with elements of a murder and a love triangle—all while immersing the reader in the strange life of the “swamp girl.”  This book felt like a warm cup of soup and your favorite sandwich on a cold day—just right and so satisfying.

  2. If you’re a Sci-fi/Horror fan:  Mr. Mercedes 

    Whether you’re a Stephen King groupie or just like a little macabre on your nightstand, Mr. Mercedes will have you quaking under the covers. While King’s fear factor is usually packaged as paranormal, the book's villain is arguably even more chilling because the evil comes wrapped in the real-life form of sociopathic computer techie. The story follows the detective and is a good old-fashioned race-against-time thriller, but King’s protagonist is so wonderfully unsettling I found him creeping into my thoughts long after I finished. Pick it up if you love a good scare or just want to completely forget about your own life for a while.

  3. If you’re a serious reader: The Secret History

    If you like your books to have a little more literary beef to them, check out The Secret History by Donna Tartt (of Gold Finch fame). Set in New England, this book tells the story of a closely-knit group of classics majors at an elite Vermont college. Though it explores the complexities of class, privilege and isolation, its real girth stems from the author (and characters') preoccupation with Greek mythology, history and philosophy. By the end of the first chapter, the reader can expect to be introduced to both complex quotes in Latin and Greek and a murder. It’s by no means an easy read, but at the end you’ll be glad you did the heavy lifting.

  4. If humor or nonfiction is your jam:  The World’s Largest Man

    If you appreciate a good memoir or just want to laugh, Harrison Scott Key’s debut book fits the bill. The memoir reads more like fiction and follows this Savannah local through a hilarious romp of his childhood as a not-so-typical southern boy. Harrison’s quirky writing style keeps both the jokes coming (often out of nowhere) while still managing to explore his relationship with a larger-than-life father.  

  5. If you’re a mystery lover:  Dear Wife

    Do you love a good mystery or an expected twist? Dear Wife, the newest offering from bestselling author, Kimberly Belle, delivers both. About a woman on the run from her husband, the book takes several twisty turns while still managing to deliver a realistic exploration of modern marriage. I almost missed carpool because I couldn’t put this one down and you will feel the same. 

  6. If you're creative or stuck in a rut:  Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear

    Most readers are familiar with Elizabeth Gilbert from her mega best-seller, Eat, Pray, Love but this book is a bit different. Part celebration of the creative life, part kick-in-the pants, Gilbert outlines her own creative process using her trademark frank and endearing writing style. An easy read, the book provides the “why” and “how” to get out of your comfort zone and by the end, she feels like your biggest cheerleader. It’s a perfect pick  for anyone looking for that “thing that takes you out of yourself and opens you up to wonder and joy.”
      
  7. If you love southern fiction or a beach read:  The Prince of Tides

    It’s the worst of clichés and many of you have probably already seen the movie, but the book is SO. MUCH. BETTER. I’ll admit I’m an embarrassingly passionate, unapologetic, uber fan of Pat Conroy, but this book is full of crazy and eccentric backstories the movie never went near. (i.e. did you know the main character, Tom Wingo, had a caged tiger?)  As always, Conroy’s portrayals of coastal life are as startingly beautiful as they are intuitive, and though I would not rate The Prince of Tides as a simple read, it’s a must-add for any self-respecting Southerner.
    ​
  8. If you're an entrepreneur: Profit First: Transform your Business from a Cash-Eating Monster to a Money-Making Machine

    If you often make a beeline for the business section at the book store or are thinking of starting your own side hustle, check out Mike Michalowicz's, Profit First. This business and budgeting book is a clever balance of conversational tone, storytelling, analogies and behavioral psychology. While business books are not high on my own list, this pick comes highly recommended from small business owner, Kelly Coulter of Coulter Web Pros who has put its theories into practice.


Your turn! What books are on your list for 2020? Or what have you recently read that you loved and want to share? I want to know—like and comment!

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Being Braver....(and Some Big News!)

10/25/2019

4 Comments

 
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Lean in and the “Net” Will Appear  

Life is funny.  I started out this blog intending to write about brave women throughout history. I’d been struggling to find a topic when I was asked to write a magazine article about a Savannah entrepreneur named Emily McCarthy. This local style maven who’d started her own business at a young age was now launching a fashion line. After the interview, I left feeling inspired by her “all-in” type of bravery.

So, as I sat down to research courageous women--those past and present who had changed the world, I got some news that changed mine.   

First, let me back up and offer a little back story. During that interview with McCarthy, something weird kept popping into my mind. As we were talking, the same expression kept creeping in. It’s a saying I once thought was insane, yet suddenly wouldn’t leave my head.  

“Jump and the net will appear.” 

Now, I am not a brave person by nature. As far as risk-taking is concerned, I’m generally more of the “dip my toe into the water, but only after I’ve checked its depth, PH level and everyone says it’s OK” kind-of-girl.

The only exception I can think of is the day I told my husband I wanted to write for a living. Writing was something I’d always done for myself. It was something I felt deep in my bones but was inexplicably frightened to talk about. I had all the excuses:  I didn’t want to blog (and put myself out there). I didn’t have a website. The kids were still little.

Deep down, I was afraid of failing. Speaking those words felt like a cannonball.

The very next day, I was pushing my shopping cart through Walmart when I came across this little porcelain pig. As silly as he was, something about him spoke to me on a gut level. That day, it felt like the possibility of being a writer was about as likely as pigs flying. Still, I took him home and put him in my kitchen so I could look at him every day. 

In some crazy, cosmic way, that little winged pig became the permission I needed and my very first “net.” Soon after, I started work on a parody gift book that’d been swimming around in my head. I also started my blog and began freelancing. In a “lean-in” sort of way, I tore through books and took classes. Later, deciding to take any writing assignment that came my way.   

So, there I was—thinking about courage and working on my own—when I got the amazing news:

I’m excited to announce that Rachel Beck of the Holloway Literary Agency will be representing me and my gift book!

Yup, little ole me now has a literary agent. I am still pinching myself.

In case you were wondering, the book is a funny “out of the box” look at marriage designed to be read at bridal showers. It’s got a crazy name (to be released later) and not everyone might get it. Some people might think it’s genius. Maybe it won’t find a publisher. Maybe it will sell a million copies. The only thing I know for sure is that I had to “jump” to get this far.  

After I finally calmed down, I went back to working on this blog and realized something important—the brave women in it were actually all around me. It wasn’t a coincidence that every one of my mentors and teachers, and all the members of my writing group are female. (Each courageous in their own right.) 

I was in my 40’s when I finally spoke those words. That’s a lot of years dreaming about something I could have been doing. I think the truest form of bravery is living a life that is recklessly, authentically, ferociously yours.  

The writing still is a completely vulnerable and exhilarating practice for me. (Truth be told, I throw up in my mouth a little bit whenever I post a new blog.) But the more I write, the more I realize that fear is just an emotion like sadness or joy.

It's my hope that someone will read this and feel a little bit braver too. The nets are all around and it’s never too late. When you lean into your dreams, anything can happen.

Take it from me, pigs can fly and so can you.

​The first step comes if only you believe.

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What I Learned Not Getting Hit by Hurricane Florence.

9/2/2019

1 Comment

 
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*This post was originally published almost a year ago today. It was one of the first things I wrote after deciding to dip my toe back into the tumultuous waters of writing. To my utter shock, the amazing website, Noteworthy, picked it up.

As Hurricane Dorian inches closer, the message feels just as pertinent today. If you missed it the first time, I hope you will take a moment and read.



All is never as it seems.
​
I was reminded of this a few nights ago watching the coverage of Hurricane Florence. From the comfort of my couch, that giant beast barreling toward the East Coast seemed a million miles away. According to the computer models, my coastal hometown of Savannah hovered just outside the “cone of uncertainty.” I fell asleep confident that we had dodged the bullet.

The next morning, I woke to a very different scenario. Overnight, the storm had dipped south and westward. The data now put coastal Georgia just slightly into Florence’s cross-hairs.

I began to panic. We had no canned food. Where was the generator? This was not my first rodeo and experience has taught me the importance of preparation. My mind went into overload as it braced for a direct hit.

And it wasn’t just me. An hour later, the grocery story was a mad house. The expression “like attracts like” had never rung truer. Every stay-at-home mom in Georgia was running around in her yoga pants fighting for a grocery cart. There wasn’t a bottle of water anywhere.

When I finally calmed down later that day, I thought about something I’d read regarding thoughts and brain chemistry. The article acknowledged that the mind is like a “feedback loop” and that everyone’s “Thoughts lie. They lie a lot” (2017). The author stated that three simple words can improve not only well-being, but actual health. All we have to do is ask ourselves, “Is it true?” (Coleman, 2017).

That morning, my reaction was not rooted in anything factual. Even our local hyperbolic weatherman had acknowledged the slim possibility of any major part of the storm hitting the city.

Then I thought about Florence herself. Between yesterday and today, nothing had changed for her. She was still churning furiously down the same pre-destined route she had been the night before. Regardless of what any computer model projected or what any television personality said, she was going were she was always going. Her path hadn’t actually changed.

Only my perception of it had.

It is a lesson I think about often as I raise my kids in this critical and sometimes confusing world. I have three boys and as I watch them grow and find themselves, I tell them: Be yourself. Pictures can lie, people can lie. Listen to that little voice in your gut. It will help you find your way, your people.

This much, I know firsthand.

About 7 years ago, we moved to Savannah from another state. I’d just given birth to our third child and I remember feeling very vulnerable. We knew no one. I needed to help our family make a life. I needed to make friends. I needed people to like me.

What I recall about that time is that sometimes I didn’t like myself. Because we were new, I thought I needed to present this perfect image to the world. I remember acting and sometimes saying things that did not feel natural to me. Afterwards, I always felt itchy and out of sorts.

Then one day, I just got sick of it — sick of myself — sick of trying so hard. As soon as I let it all go, things got better. As I started to relax, I made friends. I found my people. Like attracted like.

I think the instinct to pretend is buried deep within our DNA. In the wild, some animals only defense mechanism is to “puff themselves up,” trying to appear as big and foreboding as possible to predators.

It is a natural part of the human condition to teeter between who we are and who we want to be, between the pictures we present on Facebook and the ones we play in our head, between living authentically and caving to our worst impulses.

We may get a little rain from Hurricane Florence today--and no, there were never any sharks. Still, it  reminded me that life is always a hurricane barreling towards you.

The best anyone can do is try to live with grace inside that “cone of uncertainty.” For me, that means taking a breath before I react, checking the “loop” in my brain and reminding myself that thoughts can lie.

All is not as it seems.

Perhaps simply acknowledging that is the best preparation of all.


Coleman, Patrick. “How to Arm Little Kids Against Negative Thoughts.” Oct 20, 2017, (www.fatherly.com/parenting/little-kids-negative-thoughts-freaking-out-calm-down.).

This article was originally published in Noteworthy for Medium in September 2018.

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“Momsomnia” Never Really Ends.

6/6/2019

3 Comments

 
7 PM Seems Like a Reasonable Bed Time and Other Ways to Deal. 

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'The other night, I was lying in bed listening to the fan whirl. It was 3 am, and my mind was ticking through its to-do list. Tomorrow was gonna be a long day and I’d already burned through my usual three hours of sleep—those three ugly, drooling hours of dead person sleep which were all I was getting lately.

Somewhere on the list was a well over-due blog post. I was tired of being tired, and as I lie there, I realized I couldn’t think of a single mom who wasn’t. ​In the midst of my frustration, I realized someone needs to talk more about “Momsomnia.”

Momsomnia is a real thing. Google will tell you it applies only to moms in those first hazy post-baby months. (Because new parenting isn’t hard enough, and a condition where you’re inexplicably unable to sleep even after the baby does is a gift from nature that keeps on giving.)  For me, it started as a side effect of my first pregnancy and three kids later, it has only morphed.  

It’s this second phase of sleeplessness you don't hear about. A few years into parenting, many moms find their internal clocks  linked to the chaos of running a family. Our kids might be sleeping through the night, but we aren’t.

For mid-moms, there’s a thousand new reasons our minds run a muck. Instead of SIDS fears, we've got hormonal teenagers and aging parents. There's bullying and social media (and 12 trips to the bathroom every night.) Still whatever the reason, I’ve been doing some research and a lot of trial and error and have come up with a few things that help.
​    
The first is:
​
  • Stock Your Nightstand.

If there's one things moms know, it's preparation. Before you lie down, make sure you have all these items at your bedside. You should have a pen and paper, a pair of earphones (trust me) and a bottle of melatonin.

There are a variety of different melatonin supplements available at the drug store and any will do.  I am personally in love with the purple gummy ones. The supplement thing may very well be placebo effect, but who cares? These babies are all natural, about $10 bucks, and a great option to add to your sleep arsenal. There’s also been some promising research about Turmeric which comes in capsule form too. (I haven’t tried it, but worth a shot.)

Now as you climb into bed, look around you. Is the room dark enough? How many of those little green electrical lights are staring at you?

I will skip the lecture on wine and coffee. Nobody understands the need for a vice more than a mom, but if that’s a sword your willing to fall on, go for it. A lot of experts also recommend ceasing phone and TV for a least 20 minutes before bed.

Once you’re finally there, it’s time to get down to business.

  • Let Your Mind Roll Around in It.

When my kids were babies, “sleep training” was a big thing. Now, it's our own brains that need the re-training. When you're awake at midnight because your mind won’t shut up, I say surrender to it.

For five minutes, give yourself permission to run wild. Ruminate in the misery of your "awake-ness". Tick off every to-do list and irrational fears with abandon. After exactly five minutes, stop.

Now, roll over and write whatever bubbled up on the notepad beside you. It shouldn’t be legible. In fact, try not to turn on the light. Whatever surfaced, put pen to paper and release it.  Now pop a melatonin (follow the directions) and:

  • Start Meditating in Some Form.

Call it counting sheep, repetition, whatever—it’s time to get your lady brain to stop. I start by focusing on my breathing then try to find a single word or phrase. If you’re religious, repeating a short prayer can bring a sense of calm.

After a while, if you find this isn’t cutting it, grab the headphones and try a guided sleep meditation. Guided meditations are recorded guided experiences spoken over soothing music. Some people like to do them before bed and there are great ones all over YouTube. Download them ahead of time and put them somewhere easy to find on the homepage of your phone. (The last thing you want to be doing is clicking around in the dark.) Now roll over, find your favorite position and hit play.

There are other kooky ideas out there too. Once “stare at your eyelids and forget your tongue.” worked like a champ for me.

Still, sometimes nothing does the trick. At my worst, lying in the dark, I always go back to one thing. It is something I have talked about before, but bears repeating.

It is that the brain lies. It lies a lot.

In every woman, there is a little voice. A little place inside that whispers that you are too weak, dumb, fat...you fill in the blank. At night, it tells you that you’re done sleeping.  

Once I read an article about why moms are so tired. It talked about the innate state of "hyper vigilance" that new parenting requires. Left over from the cave man years, this mode of heightened awareness (think fight-or-flight) takes a physical toll on the body.  While this makes sense when you're chasing a toddler, middle moms need to let it go. At some point, we have to start trusting our kids, ourselves, the universe.  Quite frankly, mid-moms: Don’t believe the hype.

Because it’s safe to say that mom life isn't getting any easier. We have to trust our instincts and put as much effort into self-care as we do running our families. A good night's sleep means believing in yourself and letting go because you did the best you could.  

You deserve to feel well rested. Especially because 7 pm is really an hour best spent  watching Netflix...just try not to do it in bed.


 

Is there a sleep trick you’ve used that works for you? Comment and share!  



​

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3 Truths I’ve Learned in My 40’s.

3/1/2019

3 Comments

 
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Let's be real. Nobody likes the idea of turning 40. While I admit that oh-so-glorious day was a few years back for me, I've been thinking about aging lately.

​When Charles Dickens wrote “It was the best of time. It was the worst of times,” I am pretty sure he was talking about people in their 30’s. While it still feels like the 90’s wasn’t that long ago, this “not quite old, but not quite young” decade has already revealed a few truths anyone can appreciate.

My first and favorite is:

1: You Stop Caring What Other People Think.

Looking back at my 30's, it seems life is a ball of fire. Our kids are small, our careers are taking off and there is a nagging drive to do absolutely everything. On top of growing job responsibilities, every week is a marathon of kid activities, volunteer commitments and social obligations. I remember feeling drained mentally and physically. My mind was a running computer with 50 windows open at the same time.

We had just moved to a new state and those first years, I ran myself ragged. I remember feeling frantic if my three boys weren’t involved in absolutely every opportunity available, if my new house wasn’t magically filled with furniture, clean and perfectly decorated. What people thought of our family snowballed, taking up way more brain space than anything that frivolous deserved.

What’s worse, the more boxes I checked off each day, the less joy I got from them. The noise in my head (and all around me) made it impossible to know I wanted anything more than a glass of wine at the end of day.

For women—especially mothers—there is so much “function” in our dysfunction. The new normal is over-scheduled, bogged down and tightly wound. There are a million mixed messages telling us how to look, parent, and especially how to “have it all.” We rarely stop to think which parts we truly want.

But the gift of forty is self-reflection. Ages forces you to look in the mirror. For me, I had to stop caring and release all the minutia so I could figure out what I really wanted.

The writer Anne Lamott said, “everyone is screwed up, broken, clingy and scared, even the people who seem to have it most together…so try not to compare your insides to other people's outsides. It will only make you worse than you already are.”

Letting go is the holy grail of aging. At some point, it just becomes obvious then finally:

2. You Do What You REALLY Want to Do:

In your 40's, nothing is more precious than time. One day you wake and up and it seems there’s never enough. Whether it’s a new job, a break-up or playing guitar in a garage band, this is the “Now or Never” phase of life.

Maybe it’s because concepts like empty nest or retirement suddenly become tangible or because such a frenzied life is unsustainable, but introspection breeds change.

For me, I’ve always wanted to write. After bumping around the edges of it in a variety of advertising and teaching jobs, on my 40th birthday I verbalized it for the first time. It was one of the scariest things I’ve ever done.

Another gift of approaching midlife is passing on that permission to others. The moment I uttered those words—it just felt right. I am so lucky to be able to teach my kids to own who they are and to embrace what frightens them. It’s not always easy putting myself out there and I’m still getting used to it, (can you believe I have a website!?) but I’m going for it.

I wasted a lot of time spinning my wheels, and even that’s OK because there is wisdom in the rear view mirror. With time, it becomes apparent:

3. There Is Good Even In The Bad:

By now, life has kicked everybody in the teeth a few times. Someone we love has had cancer or passed away. Likely, there’s been more than one moment where you wondered how you would get up off the floor. I think aging takes away the rose-colored glasses of youth and replaces them with spectacles for a reason.

Maybe it was a necessary failure that led you a later success or a lesson you would have never learned otherwise, but maturity gives you space to see things.

It's funny because a few year ago, the idea of turning 40 made me ill. Now it feels one of those great things I never knew would happen. This stage of life lets you see that it’s all connected, that we are all storied and dented, and that even the hardest lessons have hidden gifts.

​Without my past, I’m not sure I’d have much to write about.

I still miss sleeping through the night, but I think it’s an even trade. A few years from now, I hope to re-read this post and find that I’ve measured the time in stories and lessons instead of years. That the breadth of my dreams (and my writing) far outweighed the constraints of my silly ego.

I’m done wasting time worrying about who people think I am. I’m ready now to figure out who I can be.
​
So check back each month, because I’ll be here—unpacking life, offering motivation and maybe dissecting the latest scandal. The best is still ahead, and I hope you’ll join me for the ride.

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